Blog traffic confuses me.

In a fit of boredom (and yes, I’ll admit it, ego) I decided to check out my blog’s stats. I was wondering how many people were viewing my site and which posts were the most popular. I have to admit to being a little surprised by the results. The top five posts are as follows…

1:  https://waffleandwrite.wordpress.com/2009/08/26/greetings-fellow-writerly-types/

2: https://waffleandwrite.wordpress.com/2009/10/30/the-horror-will-be-unending/

3: https://waffleandwrite.wordpress.com/2009/11/07/sometimes-google-scares-me/

4: https://waffleandwrite.wordpress.com/2009/10/30/the-twelve-days-of-halloween-part-eleven/

5: https://waffleandwrite.wordpress.com/2009/09/21/a-procrastinators-internet-toolkit/

The only one of the few pieces of original fiction I’ve posted here so far came in at number six.  Why should these particular posts be so favoured compared to the others I’ve made? I haven’t the foggiest idea. I think number three on the list was quite fun to write, but I have no clue as to why the others are amongst the most popular. My favourite posts are all of my fiction posts (except Redcap, which sucks like a black hole), the post about stuff I’m too old to still be doing and the post about Father Dowling.

As far as I can tell, the internet likes cheery hellos, people singing really badly, pictures of werewolves, snark and websites that act as time sinks. Considering my sarcastic nature, love of procrastination and dreadful singing voice I’m well placed to become the next internet superstar. I can only post an introductory message once and I can’t draw worth a damn, so I’m not in the best position to capitalise on those things. Maybe I should hire a “ghost artist” and create a bunch of sock puppet “guest bloggers” to give a cheery greeting? Then I shall rule the internet! MWU-HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA!!!!!!1!!!!one!!*

*At least until the tenth dan masters of blog fu that are Cory Doctorow and John Scalzi smite me for my impudence. Until that point, my evil laugh remains valid and I shall stroke my goatee beard in a menacing manner to prove it.

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One response to “Blog traffic confuses me.

  1. Is it bad that I a: have no idea who Cory Doctorow and John Scalzi are, and b: can’t be arsed to google them?

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